He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
