white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
