It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Randomize
