she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
40s are totally the cure
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
