You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
