i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
