I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I got chris browned last night
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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