how do flat chested girls get laid?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
