if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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