from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
