with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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