How'd it feel making her break her religion?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
