is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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