im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
