I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
