that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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