i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
