I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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