He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
