i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
