You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
