It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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