He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
