...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
