I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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