My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
