who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
