so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize