just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
