32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
being pregnant is like rehab
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
