we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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