i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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