fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
