Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Randomize
