hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
the raccoons are back...
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