She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
