I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
