dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
