So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
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