I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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