This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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