found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
