ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
