My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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