READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Randomize
