Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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