The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
The struggles of a small town man whore
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
COCAINE IS GR8
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
