He is like the real live version of the state fair..
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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