what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
