Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
